How To Put The 'We' Back Into Wellbeing

By Di Westaway | Chief Adventure Chick and Founder at Wild Women On Top

Sometimes I just snap.

My inner moody bitch appears without warning, dumping on those I love the most.

It usually happens when I’ve been deprived of real human contact, after spending a work-from-home day in my office/bedroom, alone with only my devices for company. I feel frazzled and fried and my kids cop it. A pile of dirty dishes or laundry instantly erupts into World War III and worrisome words tumble out of my mouth before I have time to stop them.

Often I’m so filled with remorse I fly into my bedroom riddled with guilt, further driving myself from what I need most: connection.

I start to wonder if I’m going mad; if I’m abnormal. I usually bounce back after a good night’s sleep and a few apologies and, because I’m an uber-optimist, I know I’ll make sure I never let myself get this way again. But I'm not perfect, and I often do. 

Just like mother nature, I’m always teetering on the edge, striving for balance but never mastering it. Then, occasionally, I flip. My hormones are all wrong. And it’s usually because I’ve spent too much time alone, plugged into my laptop and my world of social media and digital connections.

What I need is people. Real people connections keep me happy, vital, calm. And it's not just because I’m an extrovert. We all need human-to-human contact, not just eye contact but touches and hugs, to energise us. 

When we hug, cuddle, touch, bonk and/or breast feed, we get a hit of happy hormones. It comes from doing stuff together, whether it’s a team project at work, a movie night or a sunset walk.

When we work together and connect in person, our bodies produce a hormone called Oxytocin, and it makes us feel good. But in our digitally connected age, more and more of us are alone in our little boxes, with virtual friendships that don’t serve our genetic design.

It’s in our DNA to connect and co-operate. And while we might not be as connected as a swarm of bees, we are born to be bonded. A recent Oxford University study showed that women who catch up together once a week are much happier than those who don’t. Not only do we get happiness from connecting and fulfilment from achieving team goals, doing things - anything - together is good for our wellbeing.

But in our busy buzzy life, its hard to fit it all in. So, we need to integrate our connecting time with other things that are also good for our wellbeing.

Here’s 10 ways, other than the pub, to get more connections into your life to keep that oxytocin flowing... even if you sometimes work from home! 

  1. Ban phones at the dinner table and in the car to and from sporting activities.
  2. Choose a “favourite” child for a one-on-one walk or bike ride after dinner.
  3. Plan a weekend sunrise walk with the girls before the kids wake up.
  4. Grab a takeaway coffee at lunchtime and take it for a walk with a work colleague.
  5. Meet for a phone-free picnic at the park and chat.
  6. Organise a wild walking weekend with your partner and leave your devices in the car.
  7. Have your friends over for a meal without phones and practice the lost art of conversation.
  8. Chat to the cleaner when you bump into them in the loo and thank them for doing such an awesome job.
  9. Thank the waiter for being such a legend, even if he/she isn't.
  10. Address the petrol station attendent by name and ask him/her if/what they're studying.

If you're so busy/frazzled that organising a get together or even a family meal feels too much, join us at Trek Training to meet new friends, get outside and get those feel-good hormones every single week. 

Want to be inspired? Sign up to our newsletter.

Share this page

Latest news

73333410_10156820635558176_1907419208359084032_n.jpg
When the immediate emergency has passed and our beautiful homeland has stopped burning, we need to take some time to grieve, re-set ourselves and then begin to renew our goals, with a productive and positive mindset overlaid with the new filter of a climate changed world. Here are some ways to turn your guilt and sadness into positive action.
icecream.jpg
If you love to enjoy the sticky, delicious sweetness of a big, ole bowl of ice cream, we feel you. Us too. We wanted to try a more nourishing version that satisfies our sweet tooth and gives us our daily dose of fruit, and this recipe is a winner!
Koala.jpg
Celebrating when such a huge environmental crisis is unfolding in Australia just hasn’t felt right. The pain of knowing how many homes, animals and forests have been destroyed has been intense. Seeing so many people in our communities struggling with the force of these fires has been deeply stressful and exhausting. Now it's time for us to pause and recognise the grief and pain which has marked the beginning of 2020.
BoostWellbeingHERO
In times like this, it's important to make sure we're giving ourselves the care we need to remain hopeful, productive and strong. Here are ten simple ways you can immediately improve your wellbeing today.
desk_yoga.jpg
Stretching and gentle movement is a great way to support a healthy, happy spine – even while you’re sitting – so we asked our in-house yoga teacher/marketing specialist Donna for her favourite desk stretches to relieve shoulder, neck and back stiffness.